Anger, I behold thee.
Shivering; comfort I seek.
Thou hast only puzzled me.
Thy victory and thy defeat looketh the same.
It’s been some time, I’ve been toying with the idea of wanting to give up on social life and live like a recluse, have done it to different extents at different times. Sometimes I feel like it’s better to not work at all, find some odd things to create and find ways to sell them. Like the odd-Cabuliwalah. It seemed too depressing. I need some life with little social contact to not poke me in the face about how I’m missing my social competency way off my mark.
Well, as a solution, somehow ironically doing what everyone is talking about currently… Start up something of my own. Stand up India, Start-up India, and well… I am somewhere somehow a part of it, bro!
For the last two years I have been making things, from painting customized tees, shoes, to making dreamcatchers, to a whole lot of other customized gifts. I have pondering on the idea of been wanting to have a kaarkhaana of my own, talk to a few other artisans, and work from there on. I have been figuring that people want to gift great things to people, but end up doing the same old ghisa-pita. Nobody has the time to put some time into gifting. I love gifting. I love creating beautiful things for people. (Sometimes, I don’t feel like gifting after I have created them though :p ) And it brings me great joy to do something so specific to the recipient that it just couldn’t have been the same (as a whole) for anybody else.
#MyStartupIdea is to create a portal of customized gifting for loved ones, without feeling guilty for not finding the time to go and shop and gift the same ‘ol , same ‘ol. All you need to do is come in, share your story, share your personality traits, share the recipient’s personality traits, and I will share options of things I believe will work. Maybe even share prototypes. And then, on your feedback, would emerge a beautifully crafted creation specific to your loved on, from you! Isn’t that lovely?
Would it be successful? Depends on what your parameters are. I would be happy if I can do some good work and be simply able to earn basic expenses. That has to be enough. Should be, no? Who needs market research when you want to do this so bad?!
Reasons to start-up vary; some do it for ego, some do it for herd culture, and some do it out of social/ anti-social pressures! But jump-start your dream and work toward it, that’s what I am telling myself everyday. I don’t think it is going to be as easy as it sounds. In fact, I know it won’t be. But I hope that at the end of the day, when I take my warm shower and settle in my bed, in a house alone, I would be happy looking at myself.
I am slowly, steadily inching toward it. And soon, I would have been living my dream. Jump-started, suddenly, it will come to life.
P.S. This post is, yes, a contest entry for the contest with influencia. Start Guru, the sponsor (www.start-guru.in) is a start-up community. But besides the contest, I did pen my thoughts. I do believe that more people should realise why they are doing what they are doing, and what is the role they are going to fulfil in this society, in this life. And that role can only be fulfilled when you work toward a dream of your own, where your contribution matters. Your creation matters. 🙂
What do you think? 🙂
Butterfly: bright colors; love; nature; air;
Hold my hand, friend, I tend to get carried away,
The lightness in my head, in my soul, phew! (smiles)
But I haven’t molted yet, or have I? (frowns)
I’m scared this beauty is not mine, I’m scared I might have pain to bear.
Hue and cry, yes, dramatized, but that’s why I am a butterfly.
I spread joy, unsure within, superficial it all is, or maybe not!
Hold my hand, friend, comfort me, tell me, it will all be fine.
Please tell me it will all be fine.
He looked at her,
She felt them, the rain drops,
He smiled at her,
She felt it, the cold shudder.
He walked toward her,
It ripped her heart open.
“Will you undress me?” she said.
Slowly the scars were open,
Some wounds unhealed,
She knew it was HIM. All like HIM.
And for the many like her,
She pulled out the dagger,
“Not again, never again!”
She bathed scarlet that night,
Smiled, in years,
For years to come.
A promise too soon = a regret that lasts too long. Some may have consequences not so serious, some repercussions cause grave pain. Mine was simple. Simply put, it began with an over-zealous encouragement for my singing-talent-box friend, carried away I heard myself saying “I promise to flash at your first gig.” (I should learn to stop while I can… :/)
To my embarrassment, this turned out to be a mini art festival of sorts… Like a mini Kala-Ghoda Festival. (To all who don’t know, Kala Ghoda Art Festival is a multi-cultural festival of sorts celebrating all literary and performing arts for a whole of nine days in South Mumbai, India. http://www.kalaghodaassociation.com/ for more info. ) So, the suburban equivalent with enough space to walk, and peace to explore, was quite a refresher for an over-worked mind –> Wassup Andheri (https://www.facebook.com/wassupandheri). And to flash my assets there… in broad daylight, evening light, whatever! No way! I felt a nudge, “but… (the ever eternal pout and emotional blackmail!) YOU PROMISED!” (Damn those puppy eyes!)
While I did go armed, with a bright scarlet bra, but thankfully… the gig didn’t happen, I saved myself that one time. *Phew!*
Amongst performances which didn’t reach the stage, and the ones which didn’t spark my attention, (also I was there for only a few hours of the 3-day long festival) was a very appealing mix of art, style, and fashion – the bazaar of new artists and brands showcasing their very compelling creativity. Read on for just a small glimpse of what I caught there.
An ode to Art
A colorful celebration of natural lotus leaves dyed in organic hues to create this beautiful piece of art. The age of the leaves determine the intensity of the color soaked by them; the older the leaves, the lighter the color. (Or vice-versa. Can’t remember, I was going through trauma of the thought of my Indian parents flipping out when the see/hear/know of my flashing. “Naak kalaa kar aayi, I heard the voice in my head.) :p
This intriguing piece was showcased by Confluence Elite – The Concept Store. (www.cedpl.com)
An ode to the King
Artist Chandrakant Ganacharya creates portraits using wooden rods, following the concept of pixels. Never imagined an interpretation of the digital pixels could be like this; I was in awe of how he “extruded the pixel’s level along with the appropriate use of colour composition for the best resolution”. Want to try simple shapes myself, let’s see how that would go. 🙂
An Ode to the Woman:
“The installation represents immense latent power that women possess. She is the cradle of birth and source from which environment draws energy for sustenance of life on Earth.” – 24 year old artist, Avantika Mathur. Loved the thought. Not so much of a bra-burning feminist (I like being held up nicely), I quite loved the concept, the manifestation, and the sick person by my side added, “nice butt”… So, yeah… that too! :p
And Yay! Several exhibits to suit my wannabe fashionista senses:
Some worth a special mention:
A part of the raging pop-art culture, it manages to strike a connection with its quirky designs with the desi tadka. Didn’t catch too many pictures here. (Yes, my stupid phone gave up on me. But, hey! links available for you to explore. :p )
A wave of colors hits you with their range of digital print cushion covers, bags, wallets, and my favourite of them all, the coasters. Pssst: I love the Super Drunk one. :p
Fluke Design Company:
These guys were seriously out of the box. The bright colors and quirky designs followed, but what added to the awesomeness were the crazy magazine holders, lamp shades, kettles, mirrors, and other decor items. Fluke or not, they sure were getting it right.
Also, had to share this – The Averagers. Had me in splits. 🙂
And… About my flashing… No pictures will be posted when I finally do it. And YES, I should stop myself from committing to such promises. 🙂
“While I lay in the asylum, you quietly watch through the keyhole.
I can see you, I can feel you, yet I can’t touch you.
Wanna come closer? I wanna take a bite off you.”
I close my eyes, hold myself tight, I can smell you crawling to my bone,
But you don’t scare me.
Your masquerade as my loved one.
Oh, “grim reaper”! – A fallacy, I fall for none…
Made me stronger, your need to pretend, it drives my hunger.
To vanquish you bit-by-bit… to punish you tat-for-tit…
You may scheme, to make me look rabid,
I laugh at your sterility.
Oh Mighty One. NOT.
Inter-wound selves, you and me.
Interwoven moments, created WE.
Interpersonal lives encroached space,
heard ‘slow and steady wins the race’,
but interjections arose at every pace.
Intermittently, caught a pleasing smile,
interspersed among the many whines.
Intermission at first, the end at last.
“Don’t wait for me,” she said.
Internally I cried and waited a while
And then I walked to the tenth mile and faded away.
Towards myself, towards life, I move today!
I crawl up and fall down today!
I stumble, fumble, and see a hazy day ahead;
To find my soul, to play a role, to find a shadow, I move through door-to-door.
I see a hazy day ahead.
I might grumble but I won’t crumble;
‘coz to live I breathe; to smile I feel; to laugh I believe,
that I will survive through the hazy day ahead!
SOMETIMES IT’S JUST ABOUT TELLING YOURSELF YOU CAN DO IT. SOMETIMES, THAT’S JUST WHAT YOU NEED, TO HELP YOU PICK YOURSELF UP, OR EVEN ALLOW SOMEONE TO HELP YOU DO THAT. SOMETIMES TELLING YOURSELF IS JUST ENOUGH. THAT’S WHAT I DID. THAT’S WHY I SMILE. 🙂
This one has been dug from the archives. First piece I ever wrote which I kind-of liked. Have moved a long way, but it’s a good memory of writing. 🙂
Hope you enjoy. Happy Reading!
Nurtured with care, and all the love I could ever find,
But the womb became a barrier for my thoughts to get through.
I tried hard to come out and find myself, with myself, around myself.
I cried, i brawled, i kicked, i howled.
With that the womb moved too, but not as much as I wanted it to.
It was over-gestation!
The decision was made to finally let go! I was ecstatic!
I would be at peace. I would be with myself.
I would crawl, walk and run; live moments in lands not yet discovered.
At dawn, I started fighting to see the world and move into far-away stretches of snow!
I saw it, tried to touch it, tried to reach a momentum of a meteor.
Failing, I realized the bastards left the umbilical cord uncut!